First needle is complete!

Yesterday, I was at work and the nurses called me to say my levels were great and to start 175 Gonal-F every night and then on Sunday to start the Orgalutran. Next blood test is 7.30am Monday morning to check how it is all going.

So last night, we decide that 10pm would be a good time to do the injection. We have a dinner commitment on Saturday night and don’t want to rush home just to do the needle. Especially as no one knows we are doing this.

I get the Gonal-F pen ready and swab the area. Carla puts it in and this liquid stings more than the Puregon did. It really might have been just because the liquid is so cold! It’s not as bad as I thought it would be but I do get nervous if I haven’t had a needle for a little while. Carla is really good at calming me down though, she’s really great like that.

Once the needle has been left in for a few seconds after pushing the liquid out, Carla goes to take the needle out. She under-estimated how long this needle is compared to others we have used. not realising it was a little bit longer, when she pulls it out, the tip ‘pings’ out of my skin because it was at an angle.

I must have looked shocked and Carla looks almost devastated. Immediately she starts apologising. I assure her that it’s okay, that it didn’t hurt at all. It just made me laugh at the ‘ping’ noise and that’s what my shocked face was from.

Good news is, there is no sting afterwards! With the Puregon, it would sting for about half an hour after but with this one, I felt fine. Today the site is a little tender, but they always are.

I swear last night I could feel little niggles in my ovaries already. I know it’s probably a bit too early for that, but I’m sure I will in the next few days.

~ Anna

 

The Witch is Here

Yesterday the witch reared her head. I was so glad that it didn’t take any longer to arrive because that would have put us dangerously close to our ceremony. As it is, EPU is expected to be 3-5 days prior, depending on how I to react to the meds.

So I finished my 5 day course of Provera on Saturday. I was pleasantly surprised there were not a great deal of side effects from this. I did get a couple of headaches and an upset stomach, along with major PMS symptoms. I actually cried in a part of a movie that wasn’t even sad! But good movie! I highly recommend White House Down. I’m not a fan of overly political movies, but I really enjoyed this one.

We already had a nurses orientation booked for yesterday so they could show us how to use the medications properly. We are on a whole new playing field with the meds. We haven’t used any of them before. It’s making me a little nervous, not knowing how I will react to this lot.

The orientation went well, it was just Carla and I with 2 nurses. There was much discussion about how different this cycle would be to the previous one I had one. This will be a short cycle, where they stimulate your ovaries and then give you another medication to prevent ovulation. All up, it is generally only 2 weeks from the start of your period to egg pick up.

Because I had started my period a few days prior to what they thought I would, my medication hadn’t been ordered. That was okay though! The nurse sent through the request to the pharmacy at Norwest Private Hospital and we picked it up after work. 3 big boxes of Gonal-F now reside in our fridge and the Orgalutran is in our bedroom.

This morning we went back to the clinic for my CD2 (cycle day 2) blood test. This was to check my levels are where they should be before I start stimming. If they are, the first injection will be tonight!

The nurse doing the blood test today was lovely. Carla had gone next door to have some bloods done at the private hospital so it was just me, having my first blood test alone. I explained to the nurse that I have a needle phobia and asked if she could use the smaller needle. She said of course she would. I also told her that my veins are pretty deep and often hard to find. After looking for a few minutes, she got a heat pack. Even that didn’t help! The veins in my arms were nowhere to be seen. She found a tiny little one in my hand and got the blood from there. I barely felt a thing, yay!

So, now we wait and hope that everything looks good. In the meantime, look where they took the blood from!

~ Anna

~IMG_3871

Peek-a-boo…we found you!

Our search is over – we have found a donor and couldn’t be happier with our choice!Peek-A-Boo.jpg

He was released today and we snapped him right up as there were only 2 spots left and we each need one to be able to use the same donor. So what’s our donor like you ask? Well unlike the first donor we chose (at our last clinic), we decided to go with someone who looked more similar to me. We had a good think about it but at the end of the day Anna and I agreed that we wanted the kids to be somewhere in between our own features but the only way to really do that was to lean towards my darker features because they will more than likely dominate Anna’s lighter features… More so than lighter features being able to dominate my darker ones!

We also thought it was important to consider that we might not be able to use my eggs in the future and therefore this was a good way to still have the bubs looking something like me but not completely unlike Anna. This donor seriously looks like he could fit into my family but don’t worry, I’m sure he’s not related!

So… after we looked at his picture and thought ‘what a cutie patootie’, we then checked out his profile. His health seems to be all clear aside from a minor eye issue which apparently affects over 25% of the population. It’s very common and we weren’t too worried about that because the kids may not have the same issue and even if they didn’t take anything from the donor, there is a chance that Anna’s side will contribute to some eye problems. Anna doesn’t wear glasses herself but the rest of her family don’t have the best eyes. It could be something that affects our children anyway but hey fingers crossed they are blessed with perfect health!

Our donor also has similar interests and hobbies to Anna and I which was nice but unlike us, he is also extremely sporty and athletic. It was nice to see that he enjoys sports because the kids won’t really get that from us so perhaps they might get that side from their donor which is something we would completely embrace.

He is also very intelligent which is another big tick in our box! It appears he enjoyed studying and his hard work has led him to a career that he seems proud of. We like that he is academic and that he also seems to be well cultured. Don’t get me wrong, Anna and I are no Einstein’s but we definitely value a good education and someones thirst to expand their knowledge.

So, it appears that all of our boxes have been ticked and we now have our Mr Right! He is what we wanted and what we think will make a wonderful blend for our little family. Now we just hope that he has super sperm because we are keen to make some beautiful babies!

~ Carla

 

 

May affect mental alertness?!

Oh, Provera sounds like it’s going to be a big chunk of fun. It also tells me to beware of driving – considering I do a lot of the driving, this should be interesting.

I’ve not had this medication before. The cycle at this clinic is quite a bit different to our old one. Not sure I’m overly looking forward to the side effects of this one but we will see how it goes.

Want to hear some more possible side effects I get to look forward to?

  • weight gain or loss
  • change in appetite
  • mild stomach discomfort/pain/bloating/nausea
  • sleep problems (like I don’t already have enough?)
  • skin colour changes
  • acne, itching, rashes

And that’s just the less severe of the possibilities.

Wow, I really can’t wait.

But…

All in the name of wanting a baby. I know that I would do anything to start a family with Carla so this is all more than worth it in the end.

I have had to overcome a massive needle phobia. I think it’s now down to a moderate phobia haha. I’m pretty sure I can handle the side effect of this medication.

Bring it on!

~ Anna

Nothing extraordinary please.. just extra ordinary!

Today we received an email from our clinic to let us know that a donor we were interested in had been given the all clear and was officially on the market. They uploaded a pic of him and we were initially pleased! It was a photo of him at about age 6 we think. He looked really cute and had the hair and eye colours we were looking for to be somewhere in between the two of us.

When we sat down and worked out what we wanted our donor to be like we considered a few things. Here’s what our wish list looked like:

  1. Donor & family must have relatively good health – certain things were acceptable depending on the health condition.
  2. Physical features somewhere in between Anna and I for a blended approach but no stand out features. We didn’t want anything prominent that we would look at and go ‘oh yep they’re the donor all over’.
  3. An essay or note to the children that we connected with – we wanted someone that seemed like they have a kind and soft soul.
  4. Someone that had passion for their hobbies and interests or someone who generally showed some sort of ambition or drive.

As for point 2, we completely understand that our beautiful babies will have the DNA and genetic make up of another wonderful human out there that was kind enough to donate his sperm and make our dream something achievable however we wanted to choose someone that is ordinary looking with nothing that stands out. We don’t want the next Dolce and Gabbana model with a chiseled jaw or striking smile. We just want your average looking guy that would blend into a crowd so that the baby is more likely to have defining¬† features from either Anna or I (of course depending on which egg was used).

So that brings us to today, the person that we thought might be our donor. He was cute and sweet looking. We liked most pieces of information on his profile and he ticked virtually every box. So why didn’t we jump on the chance to snatch him up? Well… it all came down to his ears. Yep you read that right, his ears. Now don’t get me wrong, we would love a baby no matter what and this guy looked adorable as a child, but given the choice, would we avoid choosing someone with a stand out feature? Well yes, I guess the answer is yes. Perhaps we could come to accept that the baby would have a stand out feature from their donor or maybe we would need to wait until we were 100% happy with our choice. We aren’t looking to be picky but I guess for some people they look for someone who is extraordinary whereas we really just want someone who is… well, extra ordinary! The search continues… for now!

~ Carla

OMFG – Oh My Fat Gut!

I’ve been feeling heavy lately and our scales had decided to give up on me so tonight we decided to go and buy some new ones. Seemed like the logical thing to do. The right thing to do. It had been a couple of months since I have been able to weigh myself so every time we went to an appointment at the clinic and they would say “so Carla how much do you currently weigh?” I would respond with “oh you know, the same as last time”. Well I was wrong, very wrong.

We made our way into trusty old Kmart tonight because let’s face it, we love that place and will use any excuse to go there. I made my way to get some scales whilst Anna went to find a new bra (oh la la). I really couldn’t help myself, I saw an open scale sitting there on the shelf so I decided there and then that it would be a great time to weigh myself. Well what a big mistake that was. Cue shopping centre meltdown – adult style. I couldn’t believe the number I saw there in scalesfront of me. I’ve put on 10 kilos since I last weighed myself at the beginning of all the IVF treatment. It was a shock. I was in shock. I jumped off and jumped back on again to make sure the digital number was no lie. Sadly, it wasn’t. I walked around in a haze until I found Anna to break the bad news to her. I felt devastated and like I had lost complete control of my body. How did I let this happen? How could I have been so foolish to think that because I couldn’t see the scales going up it meant they actually wouldn’t be.

We left the shop and I bounced between being determined to lose the weight I had gained and feeling completely sorry for myself. I went back and forth between those two emotions about 20 times on the way back to the car.. which was a 5 min walk. I also tried to convince myself it wasn’t that bad. I tried to calculate the weight of my jeans, my jumper, my shoes.. it was all adding up to several kilos in my head but I knew I was only kidding myself. I even went as low as to thinking about how much lighter I would be after going to the bathroom. I know, that’s absolutely terrible and not a healthy view on it all. Anyway my obsession with the weight I had just found I had gained continued all the way home. I told Anna that I didn’t want to try and get pregnant again until I kicked some of that weight off. Really I have approx 4 weeks before it’s show time for me so surely I could make some serious progress in that time?! Right?!

I got home and decided that I should weight myself on the scales that we had just bought so that I knew where I was starting from. They say the worst time to weigh yourself is at night but that didn’t stop me. I stripped off down to my underwear (after taking a pit stop through the toilet) and weighed myself again. To my disappointment I had only lost 600g. All the extra weight that I thought I had removed made very little difference.

Now I’m sitting in bed and going back and forth between emotions again. I know I can lose that weight again but in my head it’s a set back. I’m supposed to be getting as healthy as possible before carrying a baby not putting weight on. I’m going backwards. Tomorrow is a new day and all I can do is carry on and focus on being healthy. I will lose the weight and then hopefully only find my tummy growing from a baby and not because of fat that is kindly clinging on for dear life!

~ Carla

 

Money doesn’t grow on trees!

Today we received an email outlining all of the costs for the IVF cycle and frozen embryo transfers (FET’s). We know full well how expensive the whole process can be put my gosh seeing it all outlined again made me nervous. It’s so upsetting to know that we have already paid for 2 full IVF cycles and 5 transfers yet still have no baby to show for it.

Our new clinic is definitely more expensive than our last but I’m really hoping that they bring us more success. I mean they do say you get what you pay for right? Hopefully the extra cost means extra care and better success! We’ll outline the costs as we go in case someone stumbles across this blog and wants to know about the costs associated with you know, creating a little human. We’ll add them on the bottom of the post as we pay each thing so that you all know when the payments were due as well because it can vary.

We’re really hoping that we get a nice and sticky baby from Anna’s next egg collection. We won’t be able to go again straight away if none of the embryos work so we are kinda putting all of our eggs in one basket! It’s a bit of a worry but I guess it will happen if it’s supposed to. We’ll just need to continue saving like crazy in the mean time so that we have a bit of a buffer. I wish we could snap our fingers and just be pregnant. Anyone that says being gay is a choice is crazy.. I mean why on earth would we choose a harder path? Anna likes to garden, maybe I can ask her to go and plant us a money tree! Ha!